maandag 10 december 2012

The power of people having Borderline Personality Disorder



Helpful facts, opinions and thoughts <3

  • Someone with Borderline Personality Disorder understands what real pain is and will always be there  for you
  •  A person with Borderline cannot help it that his or her emotions run high
  •  A patient having Borderline feels a lot and therefore is very sensitive
  • He or she already understands what you need and is able to give it to you quickly
  • He or she is in his or her own world and sometimes does not see that
  • He or she is impulsive in regards to doing something nice and this results into some nice creativity
  • He or she can come up with a poem out of the blue
  •  Perhaps he or she clings to a relationship quite a lot, but he or she does that because he or she cherishes this relationship very much, no matter how strange this might seem to you
  •  Someone with borderline asks for attention, but only does that to seek solace in his or her pain. Not to consciously deplete you.
  • He or she often rejects people, because he or she wants to be alone. The truth of the matter is that he or she does not want to bother anyone with her problems.
  • He or she wants to give you energy by doing his or her own thing, not to be ungrateful for your help.  On the contrary he or she is really grateful for your help.
  • He or she might scream and getting mad, but this does not mean it is personal. It basically comes from a deeper soul
  • He or she is enormously attention giving and enthusiastic, something quite unique.
  • He or she is really generous by her impulsivity and because of that she is really sweet to people by giving things to them
  • He or she might be vulnerable, but definitely has strong qualities too
  • He or she is so smart that she can come up with all of that suspicion, quite a gift actually even if it is a danger to him or herself
  • He or she will make it
  • He or she can write songs perfectly, because he or she experiences so many feelings and therefore he or she can translate all of that into a beautiful song.
  • Sometimes he or she does not know where to look, but certainly is willing to look
  • He or she does not know which path to follow, but certainly is willing to follow many paths where she falls and rises and sees.
  • He or she tries to understand why
  • He or she is interested in contact with fellow people having Borderline Personality Disorder.



This was my blog post for now. Please click on my name below the "about me" heading and add me to your 'circles' of Google+ and you can get informed about my latest blog posts. Also, by adding me to your 'circles' you enable me to help you out with questions you might have. Feel free to start a chat with me at any time.

Until next time.

Forest

zondag 9 december 2012

Borderline and asking for attention - analysis of story 1

Hi there. Did you end up on this blog via an external source? You can read the introduction to the topic Borderline Personality Disorder combined with Asking for attention here. The full examples of a person having Borderline and the way her environment responds to it, you can read here.


Analysis
Story 1: wrong way of wanting to solve the problem

Natasha: mom I cannot do it anymore, my life is over! I am devastated of all the concerns and I cannot sleep. *cries*
This right there is a trigger of annoyance or the outsider, the person having Borderline Personality Disorder thinks that everything falls apart and gets stuck in her own self-pity. Of course this is really annoying for the outsider. You could get annoyed to death that a person can think like that about his or her life and you as an outsider can only observe and feeling powerless. But if you put it like this, you cannot laugh a lot really when someone you care about has died or if someone just lost his or her relationship.

Yes, that is how intense a person with Borderline feels the pain and the sadness. The damage in the emotional perception of Natasha is severe that she keeps on craving for confirmation and love of which she is lacking at that moment. This is a recurring pattern. This seems strange, but it is true and it remains an empty space. Outsiders can fill this empty space by using simple words and giving a hug more often. Asking for it is something people with Borderline will not do, because it is being perceived as being weak. Natasha does this, because she wants to have faith in the people.

Let’s take a closer look at the words.

Natasha: “Mom I cannot do it anymore”
She does not see anything anymore, does she wear black shades? Or is she really getting depressed? Be careful, think about medication or try to take her problems really seriously. “My life is over”. This can indicate that Natasha has thoughts of killing herself and do not let the person get stuck in this and take her cry for attention really really seriously! “I am devastated by all concerns and I cannot sleep”. The person is so restless by all of the thoughts that he or she cannot sleep, you could do something about it by doing simple things.

You can do things like taking a shower for fifteen minutes before going to sleep, turning off your computer thirty minutes before you go to sleep. Yes this is a tough one, but still it is for the better. You can also smoke a cigarette if you smoke or listen to music on your MP3 player or watch a nice movie. Some things that help are to bathe one hour prior to sleeping or to drink some tea. *cries* yes a person with Borderline can be complicated.

Mother: “Natasha, go upstairs now!” a feeling of rejection number 1 “I want you to go to sleep right now!”
‘But don’t you get it that I cannot (if you do not understand me)’ it is late. Shoot I keep on making it worse (self destructive thought). Words are important to a person with Borderline. Every single word is taken extremely seriously when they are in a self destructive mood.

Natasha: “But mom I need you!”
A couple of simple words or a hug is all that it takes in most cases. “Don’t you see it?”. Try to show it more clearly that you understand the person.

Mother: “Yes I can see that, but you have to go to sleep now, I need rest too!”
This is entirely justified of the mother. Sometimes it is no longer possible to have a good talk between the person having Borderline and the mother. See, the mother has emotions too and this is the way it goes a lot of times. So as a person with Borderline, try to think about it in more detail, you do suck energy out of people, but it all has its reasons. There are two sides to every story.

Natasha “*swallows* But I cannot sleep, I am sad, I am so scared! Please help me!”
This is the aspect that people perceive as weak. As a person with borderline, try not to put it like that, this will make people walk away from you even more. I suggest putting it on an effective way. For example, I cannot sleep really well, could I have a cup of tea please? Just by saying this is a whole different way of acting and perhaps it is hard when feeling so sad, but you took a good step.

Mother: “I want you to stop this right now, that miserable behavior of yours! Stop it, it is enough! Upstairs, now!”
The person with Borderline feels like she is being attacked. She feels guilty and insecure, because the other person says that his or her behavior is not right. The person hates herself and thinks that her mother does not like her anymore. This happens because of fear and because this has happened in the past by traumas or other things that still need to be processed. She cannot help it, it still needs to be processed and the brain keeps on repeating a pattern that fills up the damage, just to give it a name.  

In your past, something must have happened and got to you big time. In the present you can still experience the same feelings while it is not necessary. You still experience feelings from past events? Go see a professional, but stick to reality. The people around you love you, no matter how weird it might sound to you right now.

Natasha: *screams everything all together or takes an overdose or goes cutting herself*
In this case it depends on how hard you want to fight to stop this from happening.

How to go on from here? You can read that in my next blogs.



This was my blog post for now. Please click on my name below the "about me" heading and add me to your 'circles' of Google+ and you can get informed about my latest blog posts. Also, by adding me to your 'circles' you enable me to help you out with questions you might have. Feel free to start a chat with me at any time.

Until next time.

Forest