A patient with Borderline Personality Disorder has in mostly all cases a huge lack of self esteem. This is a fact that we have seen in many studies. I have been researching the importance of self esteem in Borderline Personality Disorder. How it would affect a patient if he or she gets a better self esteem and what the effect would be. How can you change your mind set about your self esteem?
How can you affect your life by thinking different about yourself? Does it fade the Borderline Personality Disorder or will only an aspect get better? Why does a person have a lack of self esteem and why do people with Borderline especially have a lack of self esteem?
Borderline is the border, of your own limits
A person with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) has a lower border. That is why the disorder is called Borderline. Have you ever thought why they chose this name specifically? It is because people with BPD have almost no border whom you can cross. The person does not know his own border. This comes from past experiences, where they have been hurt or have been told stuff that they have learned to believe.
Like bullies telling them ''You are stupid'' they will still re-live. The other important aspect is that people with borderline have an error in the developing of their own identity. The reason behind this is that people having Borderline are having no limits. As you can see, Borderline patients are very creative, but not just on one aspect. Which is a positive trait.
With making decisions, with relying on people, with limits, they cannot see their limits themselves.
So they will go across their border, and this causes a lot of trouble. They cannot see the consequences of particular situations, they say stuff and afterwards they do not know it was not right. People with borderline can come in a state of mind of getting depressed, and they only believe one truth. A person with Borderline Personality Disorder cannot place two realities next to each other at the same time.
If it is black, it is black, if it is white it is white. Probably when you, as a parent or a partner get mad at them or say something negative, they will only believe that part on that particular moment. They can only deal with the situation when the white (good) parts come back to the situation. People with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) cannot deal with negative situations very well.
They cannot see the grey area. The best way to deal with a situation as a patient with BPD, is to learn to cope with the fact that a situation is negative. Try to think of situations where your loved one was in a nice mood with you, and you should still see the grey area.
When your escalating, try to think back of situations where you were in a good state of mind. Try to mentally improve the way you think, to not take drastic actions, like you do now.
Try to believe that situations even in crisis, will get better, if you just hang on the grey area in between. It might look awful for you in your mind in crises, because you cannot see the whole picture.You think you are lost in the forest, you just do not know what to think so do not force it. Try to learn to think more practical. That is a hard part because when a person having BPD is escalating, it is basically a crashing mind with impulsive behavior to not think about confronting topics.
Try to learn that the confrontation is a tool to learn how to act differently. We are still researching to help you take these steps. This is just a brief blog to make you understand why it is so hard for a borderline patient, but we will definitely help you on this blog.
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Have a wonderful relaxing day. Until next time.
Forest.
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